funny..

its funny how hurt i am when u said sth dat i dun wanna hear..
its funny how i get upset if u dun pass my expectations..

its funny how u well u read my mind..

its funny how angry i am when u turn away..

its funny how careless i am when i wus not even given a 2nd chance in return..

its funny how silly i look when im happy..for no reasons..

its funny how i forgot how important it is to appreciate family..

its funny how stupid i was when i thought a guy can made me happy..

its funny when i told sumone else to spread their wings and dun hesitate. cuz im frozen inside. cold and unreachable..

its funny to listen to sumone else dearly. like he/she is the whole world to u and yet that sumone dosent knoe it..

its funny to carry all dis hopes wif u but the truth is, ur afraid that they'll be gone first thing in the morning..

its funny the way ppl que at ATM and pray that their money will sumhow be multiplied.. i wish i cn live without too much attachment to $$$.. dosent happines lies in ur heart dat is close to ALLAH?

its funny how gud i am to compare how irrelevant sumone cn b with their undefineable actions but sumhow, im complicated too..

dear ALLAH, i knoe im not the best (yet).
but still, pliz dun let me be the WORST.. ameen!

misi: khatam al quran..

status: juz 9 setengah..
misi: lagi 21 juz..

action plan: 200 mukasurat sehari
due: 28, 29, 30..

harapan: mcm xdeharapan je nie.. iksh2..

matahari dalam hati..

its funny how ppl look forward to see sumone else.. well, its not dat funny nway, but i'll still feels dat way. when ur heart juz can't focus and all u see is juz wat u wanna see.. sumtimes its so easy to look down on others. and as well as let ppl down.. i wont let u down sounds i'll let u down nowdays.. frm paklah to our besties.. and no, im not complaining prof.. im reflecting! =) and i juz purposely put it in a form of words yg menunjukkan yg saye ini xde lah mcm seakan2 terlibat same dgn adegan2 drama swasta yg menarek hati. heh~ but then, yeah, i think, iv been making ppl dissapointed..alwez~ iv look down on ppl as well.. and as much as its no gud, its gud in a way dat, when i realized dat its no gud, i turn to ALLAH and says, god, pliz dun let me be like dis.. sume org tak perfect.. y shud i expect they r when im myself not? im having ids trouble nowdays, d feeling of not moving on.. like my feets are glued on the ground and im heavily emotional inside dat i cn explode anytime i want. but then i quit being the negative me. y shud i b negative when there is still hope? when ders sumone dat can light the smile in ur heart? (provokasi gitu..haha.) tapi betol lah kan.. and allah is always der to let u see that this life has a power. and that power dosent necessary means MIGHTY. u cn be TINY and hv a lot of power.. like ur pituitary gland.. ow yeah its tiny, but amanah ALLAH bg kat dia, masyaallah, saya tak mampu nak ucap terima kasih yg mcm mana lagi pada si kecil berkuasa besar ini.. and all of a sudden, u find happiness in the small2 things in life. yg tak perlukan duit sgt pon.. like a smile, a laughter, a walk(to remember), free gifts, kad raye, a heart to heart conversation, a satisfaction of knowing ur doing the right thing.. anything~ as long as u open ur heart as wide as u cud.. mcm jendela. cahaya takkan masuk ke dalam jendela yg tak terbuka.. i believe in dat.. u cant reach to sumone else if u shut urself. as if its so hard to let ppl in and knoe the real u.. wuts to b afraid of? well, the truth is, everyone is afraid.. but if u keep holding on to the fear, when will happiness be knocking on ur door?



matahari dalam hati, keluarlah kamu menyinari duniaku dan insan-insan yg aku sayangi...

juz give me a minute

i cn change my mind u knoe...
im not rigid..
neither a robot.
im human! perfectly created by ALLAH.
im not complaining, ur fine d way u r too..
but cn i juz be left alone sumtimes..

dun bother me lah..
im fine. d way i c it, i juz need a push.
not downhill but against the odds..
if ur dat ignorant also, then fine..

i dun mind either..
i juz wanna b brave. untuk menghadapi suatu yg tak pasti.
and to be brave, shahirah..trust ALLAH. trust in His takdir..
kun fa ya kun..maka jadi, jadilah...

im fine. juz fine~

tolong?

tolong g jogging, tolong ckp pelan2-awak perempuan, tlg buat qiam-xsusah pon, tlg abes blaja:tak nak blaja terjun laut.., tolong senyum slalu walau hati saket-tak susah pon berlakon.. tolong susun kehidupanmu..walau jalan tak bisa dipilih tapi kalau tak ada peta bukan lg susah ke? i need a compass! and tlg shuddup pasal si pendek bleh tak? aku tau r ko bukan robot tapi bleh jer merobotkan diri kan.. ahh, x guna lah semua nie.. y wud u worry? he's fine.. sgt fine! and stop gelak2 mcm xde keje ya. and melembapkan diri.. hello! dh 2nd yr kot.. and kna hentam dgn m.o mcm xde harge diri ke? owh, teradvance.. so? aha, nk behadapan dgn si dungeon master bagaimn? semua bende lupa n tak tau? gila lah.. ko nie pehal nie.. apesal ko mcm nie. mun pon complaint tau. asal ko ske marah2? x leh terima elok2? mcm lah bgs sgt.. argh! x bgs langsong-langsong.. and those faces! well, i knoe. im d black sheep of d family and maks, im sori.. sy lupe. sy hebat.. semua org pon hebat. juz gv up and bodo tak tau lupe diri! haha. der,der.. chins up dowh. ur fine d way u r!

today...

today.. i juz knew u'l wear wat u wear..
today.. i tried not to see u as close as my heart wanted to.
today, i tried to hate u and as usual i forgot at the moment i saw u smile.
today, i assume ur looking at other ppl thou i wus sky hoping ur eyes r on me..
today, i brush u aside frm my deepest hollow. which was cool coz it means im moving on..
today, is a suddenly day. all of the sudden der is a irritating shhhhhh and the window comes down and there i go again.. dearest stereotype value of a one hand no sound.. wake up, big heart.. everything will b juz fine.... =)

papa@syapiqq

papa ku.. selamat hari jadi dan selamat lekas sembuh.. amin!

u say wut?

any doubts?

ergh! wut d? i hav absolutely no doubts ok.. i assume!!!! and dats a biggie difference between the two! sape pedulik either ur der or not or how close i am to u or how much i care? wus it alwez ok for u not to care at the first place pon wusn't it? hello... like im dead without u? im fine, without u.. absolutely. obviuosly!!!

ITS BEEN LONG...

SINCE I TALK TO PILOT.MENG.CHIP.ESOH.NANA.MC.KAJOL.UIA PPL.MIDAH.ZAZU.

SINCE IV BEEN BANNED.

SINCE I HAD AN ICE CREAM

SINCE I WENT TO COLLEGE.

SINCE I EAT KETUPAT.

SINCE I ATE AYM PERCIK.

SINCE I HAD A GREAT LAUGH

SINCE I WENT TO D MOVIES

SINCE I WATCH HOUSE

SINCE I WENT FOR UMRAH..

SINCE I BLK MY EX DRIVER'S KG

SINCE I CALL SUMONE..

SINCE I KNEW WAT I WANTED TO DO..

I LOST MYSELF OUT OF NO WHERE..

storm, go away

brain storm..

in dedication to the any survivors of a disaster make it cancers or heart brake or accidents.. allah always reminded us in a different ways.. live life to the fullest!

allah,ampunkan aku atas kurangnya kekuatan yg aku ada..

u knoe sth that i dun..

i dun wanna knoe y u choose the choice ur determine wif..
ur uncomfortable?
heh. u dun hv to tell me.. i cn tell dat. body lnguage speaks alrite~

rabu bla3

wutever!

dearest pkc

u knoe ur my favourite kan.. and still ur d cakap bende penting je type. which i hv dis love-hate perception of but then, i dun regret nemore, u knoe.. i dun hv dis, y,y, like dat so much dah like imune sudah dgn hoe halimunan u cn be sumhow.. heh. i miss those days lah. when i cn juz be volatile and scream ur name.. and those moments where u watch me eif me unknowing.. dat wus cool. well, at least for me.. sum ppl said, forget u and i said, yeah i shud but its easier said then done u knoe.. how cud i? d moment seeing u is like menang loteri, ok. haha. and when u smile, i felt like the whole world is smiling to me. jeez. yeah, exaggeration but the truth is the truth alrite.. and ur like my super big awesome brother tau. whom i really listen to. whom i hear not because u made me to but because i wanted to. and its alwez easy when ur around.. it alwez does.. i love making fun of u, tau.. heh. coz i felt like it. making faces at u is all neutral. and im so not afraid of those eyes ok! i adore dem.. haha. yeah, wutever. wutever,pkc. wutever~

no more

bye2 dearest. u cant tell the difference, i knoe.. but wuts importnt is d way u look urself. not wut they thot.. serius? naah. i juz wanted to believe that way.. u may hv ur own belives and opinions and u knoe wut, sumhow i dun care nemore.. it alwez been for other ppl.. i wanted to do dis for me! i wanna do it cuz i wanna do it and i dun wanna hesitate doin it juz because u find it weird! daa!!!!

puase already? how fast is dat... hurm. and final is coming.. allah, help!